How People-Pleasing Behavior Can Help You Improve Your Health.

How People-Pleasing Behavior Can Help You Improve Your Health.

How People-Pleasing Behavior Can Help You Improve Your Health.

 People-pleasers have a reputation for going above and beyond to meet the needs of others. Going above and above to please people might leave you feeling emotionally drained, agitated, and anxious, even if these traits are normally positive.

A people-pleaser is someone who puts the wants of others ahead of their own. People-pleasers are often seen as agreeable, helpful, and kind and have a high sense of empathy for others. However, they sometimes find it difficult to stand up for themselves, which can lead to destructive habits of self-sacrifice or self-neglect.

People-pleasing is linked to the personality trait known as "sociography," which refers to an excessive concern with winning others' approval and preserving relationships. This behavior might indicate one of the following mental health conditions:

  •  Anxiety or depression
  •  Avoidant personality disorder
  •  Borderline personality disorder (BPD)
  •  Codependency or dependent personality disorder

What are the signs that please people?

So how do you know if you're a nice person or someone who fits the people-pleasing profile? It's one thing to want to help others because it's part of your nature but people-pleasers are often taken advantage of by others. May contain signs that you may be a man-pleaser  

People-pleasers frequently exhibit a variety of traits. Here are a few signs that you might be a people-pleaser:

  •  You find it tough to refuse someone.
  •  You are concerned with what people may think of you.
  •  When you decline requests from individuals, you feel bad.
  •  You worry that if you decline their invitation, they'll think you're       rude or self-centered.
  •  You consent to things you dislike or perform actions you don't want to.
  •  You experience issues with poor self-esteem.
  •  You want people to like you and believe that by helping them, you will gain their respect.
  •  You apologize to people all the time.
  •  Even when something isn't your fault, you accept the responsibility.

People-pleasers are frequently adept at perceiving others' emotions. Additionally, they frequently exhibit compassion, consideration, and empathy. These positive characteristics could also be coupled by low self-esteem, a need for control, or a tendency toward overachievement.

Understanding some of the reasons for your prospective people-pleasing conduct is essential if you want to stop doing it. There could be a number of components, such as the following:

  1. People-pleasing conduct can occur when a person has low self-esteem and doesn't respect their own needs and desires. People-pleasers may feel that doing things for others would result in acceptance and approval because they lack self-confidence and have a need for external validation.
  2. Others may try to please others out of insecurity, fearing that others won't like them if they don't go above and beyond to make them happy.
  3. Perfectionist tendencies: Some people demand that everything be "just so," including what other people are feeling and thinking.
  4. Past experiences: Difficult, painful, or traumatic events may also have an impact. In order to avoid encouraging abusive conduct in others, for instance, persons who have experienced abuse may try to placate others and be as accommodating as they can.

There are instances where assisting others is motivated by altruism. Someone may have a strong desire to ensure that others get the help they need. In other circumstances, striving to win people over could give someone the feeling of being loved or accepted. When people's happiness is guaranteed, they feel important and useful.

Pleasing others isn't always a negative thing. Being thoughtful and empathetic is necessary to keep close ties with loved ones. However, it raises questions if you're seeking validation to bolster a shaky sense of self-worth or if you prioritize the enjoyment of others over your own emotional well-being.

Anger and Frustration

Even though you might enjoy helping, you're also likely to feel frustrated when you're acting resentfully or out of obligation. These emotions may cause a vicious cycle in which you assist someone, get upset with them for abusing your kindness, and then feel guilty or sorry for yourself.

Anxiety and Stress

Trying to manage everything might lead to stress and anxiety, which could be harmful to your health.

Helping others can actually have a number of benefits for one's mental health. Making time for yourself is important, but failing to do so puts your health at danger from the negative consequences of stress.

Decreased Willpower

If you devote all of your work and mental energy to making other people happy, you are less likely to have the will and willpower to achieve your own goals.

According to some research, willpower and self-control may be limited resources.

If you are using your mental energy to ensure that other people have what they want or need, it may simply mean that you don't have much time left to focus on your own needs.

Lack of Authenticity

You might even start to think that you don't even know yourself if you think that you aren't living your life honestly as a result of this.

Weaker Relationships

If all of your efforts are directed at making sure you meet everyone's expectations, you might become resentful. 

It's possible that some people are abusing you without even knowing it. Since all they know about you is that you are always willing to assist, they are confident that you will be there whenever you are needed. They might not be aware of how overcommitted and spread too thin you are.

If you discover that you are a people-pleaser and it is harming your wellness, talk to a mental health expert. You can establish sound boundaries, control your behavior, and put yourself first by working with a licensed therapist.

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